Both Worlds and Finding Balance

The past twenty-four hours have been wonderful. In large, due to the variation of experiences, the people, and the way in which the important stuff has shone through.

Today blended what felt like a few distinct worlds into one unique bottle. Three circles, gradually smaller. The first, alone time. This bucket has been filled in varying quantities so far this year, but always to some extent as a core priority. Despite the social nature of the day, this all-important time was carved out. Such as the time spent writing this post, or for the short chapter I read before this, or the late hour in which I managed to sneak in my run for the day.

The second component. Shared time with my girlfriend. Always there when living together abroad I suppose, but you can often find yourself in the same room, without really being present with one another. Today, time together was spent in a quality fashion. Where moments felt like they were being experienced together, not just a living quarters. Box ticked. Not one to be neglected.

Finally, the widest circle. The one least often shaded in. Broader social interaction. Friends. New friends. Spontaneity. Embracing the backpacker freedoms and simply meeting random people. Investing in connection. It has been a struggle at times. When you’re staying by yourself at a hostel in the centre city, reaching out feels almost compulsory. You need it to get by. By design, it is only a matter of time before you strike up conversation with someone else. But there are is a lot of comfort in travelling as a couple. You don’t need anyone else, per se. Yet, it is so easy to forget just how rewarding it is to meet new people.

Last night, we went out for dinner, drinks, and light-hearted card games with a friend. Brilliant night. Simple. Decided we were tired around 10:30pm. Home seamlessly before 11pm. Such is the beauty of transport here. I had a very large beer for ¥390. Nothing more. But some significance there. First, cheap. Yes, quite notable. Second, balance. I’ve been conservative with prioritising recovery given I’m now a week out from a marathon. Extremes aren’t always needed though. I can have a drink, stay out, and still smash out a hard run the following evening. It doesn’t need to be either strict sobriety with a party-killing bedtime, nor a wild night spent wasted and awaiting the first morning train. A middle-ground exists. The present can be enjoyed without reluctance or guilt whilst simultaneously prioritising myself, and future ambitions. Lovely night.

Today we returned to Café LA in coffee-shop form, but this time with new friends. Friends yet to be made. We enjoyed the relaxed atmosphere and simple ability to just sit down a pick a board game. We were going to grab a coffee just the two of us and play Catan. The Japanese version of the board game features significantly smaller pieces. It was cute, and I guess fit the style? But, there was a twist in our plan! We discovered nomadtable, an app designed to meet others—principally young solo travellers—through shared activity. Upon posting that we were going to grab coffee and play board games at 2pm, two guys reached out, to our surprise. It could’ve gone a few ways, but it was a lovely experience. It was just really really comforting to chat with other people. Travellers with unique stories and personas. All like us, in some ways. Slightly lost. Yearning for connection. Pretty cool. One thing leads to another. Around 10 people have said they’re keen to join us at an arcade/sports playground place on Monday after lunch. We’ve made plans to go on a waterfall hike tomorrow. When you realise there are others out there who are indirectly looking for you, and then you find those people, you breathe fresh air. You both have free schedules, inherently. Plans are made. Friends, too.

You can opt in or out, too, though. We still enjoyed a peaceful night at home. Cooked dinner. Called my family. Made time to write this. I could be at the club right now. But I’d rather not. A hike tomorrow, though? Maybe. I’ll decide in the morning. That’s the very beauty of living like this. Suddenly a lack of direction and busyness becomes empowering, not daunting. The free time feels rich with opportunity, not like a void that you’re trying to fill. Finding others opens up your world, but balance is still important. More days like the last two would be ideal. Time for myself. Time spent together. Time for others. Co-existing, on our terms. When the social battery dies, my routines at home will be there waiting for me. I can be alone if I choose. Or, not. That’s a nice luxury to have. I feel very grateful for today, despite not filling a certain productivity quota. Life is about more than that. If I can continue balancing the social and personal as I did over the past twenty-four hours, it will add a lot to our travels moving forward, I think. I’m excited. Have a great weekend!